Woman Says Having Children Is Only Worth It If You Have These 3 Things

• TikTok user dominiece_ replied to a childless woman who asked moms if their kids are worth it in a video
• She said there are three things that want-to-be mothers need to assess if they want to have kids
• The video went viral, amassing 761.3k views

The debate around whether or not to have children seems never-ending. TikTok user dominiece_ made a video responding to the loaded question, claiming that children are only worth it if you have these three things.

She noted that, without these three elements, having children would be a major challenge. 

“The answer is, No, they aren’t worth it,” the Tiktoker, who is a mother herself, bluntly began.

“The thing about it is, children will be the greatest love you’ve ever, ever known or experienced. It’s like nothing you can even explain, right? But with every high there is an opposite and equal challenge to go with it,” she continued.

She then went into detail about the three things every mother should have before expanding their family, noting that they “are not all weighted the same.”

“You need a good partner. You need somebody who’s going to be a team player, an active player, not stressing you out, not taking away from your peace, not being a hindrance, and worse, a child themselves,” she said.

“Number two, resources, i.e., money,” she continued. “It comes and goes. There are all these different programs, but when I’m talking about resources, I’m talking about money. You need to be able to pay for the things that you cannot get if you don’t have a good spouse or a good partner, whatever the case may be.”

The last thing on her list was a good support system. “If you have a support system, maybe your mom, maybe the aunts, maybe you have a good, huge tribe around you, and you can, you know, help with the kids, and lean on one another. But if you don’t have these three things, no, the kids are not worth it. Do not risk your life for it. Do not risk your sanity for it.”

She noted that “you don’t have to have all three things,” but ideally a want-to-be mother would have at least “two of the three.”

“The good partner is probably the heaviest, most weighted,“ she concluded. “Because even if you don’t have a support system, even if you don’t have money, you have somebody who can figure it out with you. You have a team player.”

“You have someone to help you through the trenches, because there will be trenches no matter how perfect your child is — because they are so perfect and you will never find a love, and you will never feel a love that way. But I assure you, that will never be enough.” 

Many of the women took to the comments section of the video to share a similar sentiment. One of the commenters added “The lows are lower than the highs are higher.” 

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“They’re only worth it if you have a support system and money,” another commenter added. 

Some of the comments came from moms who, while they love their kids, would agree that it’s not worth it. “Every woman who told me it’s not worth it, are all moms,” one user added. 

“Just because mothers feel this way does not mean they don’t love their children!” One user commented.