By KBC Associate 
Consent in Sex: More Than Just a “Yes” or “No”
Too many people think of consent as a checkbox to tick before sex, but the reality is, it’s a continuous process. It’s not just about getting that initial yes; it’s about checking in, staying present, and ensuring both partners feel comfortable at every stage. A key part of this is understanding that consent isn’t just verbal—it can be expressed through body language, facial expressions, and overall responsiveness. Paying attention to these cues can help avoid situations where someone feels pressured but doesn’t verbalize it.
Another important factor is that consent should always be freely given. If someone feels guilted, manipulated, or coerced into saying “yes”, then it’s not really consent—it’s compliance, and that’s not the same thing. Sex should be something both partners actively want to participate in, not something one person tolerates to keep the peace. And just as importantly, consent should be revocable at any time. Just because someone agreed to something initially doesn’t mean they’re locked into it. If a partner changes their mind mid-way, that decision should be respected without question.
The Power of Ongoing Check-Ins
Checking in during sex isn’t about ruining the mood—it’s about enhancing it. Asking something as simple as “Does this feel good?” or “Do you want me to keep going?” not only ensures you’re on the same page but also builds trust and intimacy. When partners know they have the freedom to express what they like (or don’t like), it creates a more open and enjoyable experience for everyone.
But check-ins shouldn’t just happen during the act. Conversations about consent can and should happen outside of the bedroom. Talking about boundaries, turn-ons, and hard limits ahead of time can prevent awkward situations and ensure that both partners feel comfortable and respected. It also helps remove the pressure of making split-second decisions in the heat of the moment. And let’s not forget about non-verbal check-ins—noticing if your partner is reciprocating, if they seem tense, or if their energy has shifted can tell you just as much as words can.